gender

hieeeee welcome to my gender page... i made this cause i like to conceptualize my gender in different ways ^_^ it's fun and helps me understand it and myself better -- i consider my gender and my transness to be an integral part of my identity and who i am as a person, because it's informed so many of my experiences and i've lived so much of my life as a trans person -- plus it makes other people think about gender as well which i think is a good thing.

labels (and definitions):

transsexual -- "denoting or relating to a transgender person, especially one who has undergone gender reassignment" -- i like this because of the implication the word carries that sex is not an immutable, inherent thing, that it can be changed. i also like it because it's mostly only used by people who have undergone or are undergoing medical transition, because i can relate to them and their experiences (as a trans person) more than i can to someone who only socially transitions.

bigender -- "denoting or relating to a person whose gender identity encompasses two genders" -- i use this label because i consider myself to be both male and female; i also use bi-sexual (an older definition of the word) the same way. i'm a tomboy and i'm some random guy in a grocery store. smiles

androgyne -- "an androgynous person [of indeterminate sex; having the physical characteristics of both sexes (dated)]" -- i like this word because i look fairly androgynous, and because i do have physical characteristics of two sexes. i refer to myself as this because it feels like a recognition that i have changed my sex characteristics through medical transition.

bisexualgender -- this one doesn't really have a definition and it's mostly a silly, non-serious label (i wouldn't go around in real life describing myself this way) but what it entails is essentially that my bisexuality influences the way i experience my gender. so my gender is bisexual. i use this because i do kind of relate to the notion that it's as a bisexual that i'm attracted to people, rather than as a man or as a woman or whatever. i'm not mlm, wlw, or any variation of that, i'm just bisexual. smiles again

i primarily identify as a bi transsexual, and i go about my daily life as a trans man. my legal sex is male, i mostly use he'him pronouns with people i know in real life, etc etc. i prefer to use she/him pronouns, but honestly any are fine ^_^ idrc

abstract definitions!!

now for the super fun and confusing part! i’m masculine in the way the planets mars and mercury are masculine and i’m feminine in the way the planet venus is feminine… i’m a partly-cloudy day in mid-march, around the time when the snow has mostly melted and the trees are starting to get buds but the grass isn’t quite green yet and it’s around 10° but there’s still a cool breeze and melting snow on the ground… i’m beige and white and blue and black… i’m a tabby cat, i’m black and white spotted, i’m a fawn abyssinian… i’m colourful stars stuck to your face and hands, a white keyboard decorated with stickers, i’m cute charms dangling off the end of a mechanical pencil… i’m a half-bloomed pink tulip and lily of the valley flowers growing from underneath a fence and a small stream trickling through your backyard… i’m studying languages on a spring day in a rickety old treehouse and i’m flipping through textbooks and taking notes with the flashlight on my phone at 3 am… corduroy pants, the feeling of knit… swimming laps in the pool… playing music in your earbuds at full volume. burning cds. warrior cats books stacked on a shelf. driving on lonely country roads with the windows down as it turns to dusk.

a lot of that is drawn from experiences or things in my life i’ve seen because when thinking about my gender i like to draw from things that have impacted me as a person to conceptualize it! i hope you enjoyed reading about my super special gender ^_^ hi if you got this far btw i know this is so long…

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